三十七年前,蘋果電腦正在推銷這件木製的產品,上面 APPLE 字樣,比幼稚園生在習字簿上寫的更差。
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三十七年前,除非神智不清,否則沒有人會預言,這家公司在三十七年後,可以壟斷流動音樂市場,帶動通訊革命,革新大眾的攝影習慣,擊敗 Sony 的 Walkman,令 HMV 和 Kodak 破產,也令Motorola 被收購。
只要有夢想,未必凡事可成真,但夢想永遠是成功的第一步!
As the title suggests, you won't find anything here that will make you sorrow. Certainly our world is far from perfect, but that won't prevent us from viewing every thing positively. Drop me a line, but don't use real name. You're my good friend and I know who you are.
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七老八十才屆人生快樂巔峰?英美不約而同有此研究結果,指人到中年確實萬事憂,但45歲後則柳暗花明,若健壯且不愁經濟,晚年多會邁向更歡樂美好的人生。
青蔥歲月是人生最快樂時段的傳統概念,已遭學者推翻。倫敦大學學院生物學教授Lewis Wolpert分析,我們在少年十五二十時只屬「一般快樂」,踏入中年須承擔事業、家庭的責任和壓力,快樂感開始減少。至40歲是個里程碑,往往被視為從人生高峰逐步走下坡;然而45歲左右峰迴路轉,開始變得開懷樂觀,並持續到七、八十歲達到高峰。長者某些能力如運算等雖漸衰退,語文及決策力則隨著大腦成熟而增強。更快樂是源於自信、智慧的積聚,也懂得切斷不快樂源頭。
美國國家科學院對34萬人的調查亦發現,幸福感從年輕時代逐漸減少,至年近五旬又開始增加,而快樂持續增長,到85歲達頂峰;研究指,健康和穩定經濟是老人的快樂保障。
(quoted from am730)
2011年2月2日
麗都美識
在美國德克薩斯大學心理學副教授Sam Gosling的著作Snoop: What Your Stuff Says About You中,他提到紐約州立大學心理學家Arthur Aron「我想了解你」的「分享遊戲」:陌生男女受試者循序漸進地回答三十六條問題,一小時後,這些男女已揭露自己性格。
以下是其中一些問題:
如果你可以任意選擇,在這個世上,你最渴望跟誰一起共晉晚餐?我會選擇拉登。本來我想說奧巴馬,但我覺得要見奧巴馬,一定比要見拉登容易。說不定奧巴馬落任後還會來香港吃蛋撻。
在打電話給別人之前,你有否曾經預先綵排一次?為什麼?有,我這種天生神經緊張的人,當然有。即便打電話叫外賣,我都會在腦裏面演說一遍,惟恐自己臨場失準,把簡單如「頭抽煎豬排飯多豉油碎上炒底少蛋加葱走蒜」都交代得不清楚。
於你來說,怎樣的一天才稱得上「最完美一天」?讓我想想,嗯。可以盡情地吃喝,無論吸取了多少反式脂肪和壞膽固醇,二十四小時後都可以全部排出體外。那麼,跟我勞燕分飛的鵝肝、臘腸和薯片,將可與我上演牛郎織女的難得團圓。
如果你有九十歲壽命,在你人生中最後六十年,你想一直保持三十歲時的身體抑或是三十歲時的思想?這顯然是「心老人不老」還是「人老心不老」的抉擇。不過我當然是挑「心老人不老」。
如果你可以改變你成長過程中任何一些經歷,你會選擇什麼?我本來想說「不要被媽媽用藤條抽打」,但是換個角度看,沒有被媽媽打,我可就少了很多寫稿題材。
如果明早醒來,你就可以得到一種技術或者專業,你希望是什麼?我想擁有「撻」一下手指就能催眠任何生物的能力。到時候,我不會再怕蜥蜴、老鼠和恐怖分子。
心理學家發現,這些問題比「你的理想是什麼」、「你以前做過些什麼」更能促進了解,而且不會令人覺得氣氛有若開會般凝重。不妨在拜年時跟朋友玩玩。
This article is adapted from Lamont's blog - Uphill Idealist.
There are two kinds of friends in the world: Sunny day friends and rainy day friends. There are lots of people that we define as friends, but they are really acquaintances.
Two men were out hunting. Suddenly one yelled and the other looked up to see a grizzly charging them. The first started to frantically put on his tennis shoes and his friend anxiously asked, “What are you doing? Don’t you know you can’t outrun a grizzly bear?” “I don’t have to outrun a grizzly. I just have to outrun you!”
This story is funny, but it does help define the distinct difference between a rainy day friend and a sunny day friend. The sunny-day-friend is more concerned with watching out for their own health and wellness, than their friends’ well-being.
On the other hand, a rainy day friend is willing to take risks, work for the benefit of others, and sacrificially care for the needs of another person.
Rainy day friends are the ones who listen to us when life is difficult, and remain faithful in friendship and relationship when the rest of the world turns their back to us. The scriptures give us some excellent examples of sincere friendship, but God’s desire to connect with humanity is beautifully expressed by the account of Abraham and God in Genesis 18 and Jesus and humanity in John 15. In Genesis 18, you will find a picture of God (in the form of the complete trinity), coming to have a meal and spend time with Abraham. Abraham has been called God’s friend.
James 2:23 23 and the scripture was fulfilled which says, “Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness”; and he was called the friend of God. Abraham’s relationship with God mirrors God’s desire to be in close relationship with all of his children. This relationship was not only available to Abraham, but it is available to all of us today. Is God your friend like Abraham experienced?
In John 15, we find that God’s intention all along was to be our very best rainy day friend. Jesus not only speaks of the value of sincere friendship, but also exemplifies it by the risk, challenge and sacrifice of his actions. God allowed Jesus to sacrifice himself for humanity to have the opportunity to become friends of God. God is purposefully reaching out to us in his actions and words.
God introduced himself to Abraham in Genesis over a meal and conversation, Jesus created a roadway to God by his ministry and ultimate sacrifice described in the gospels and the Holy Spirit continually supports, promotes and provides the basis necessary to build relationship with God. (Ephesians 2:17-19)
Sometimes we encounter obstacles in friendships. How about Abraham and God? What even could have become a blockade for Jesus in his befriending of humanity? Thankfully, Jesus did not allow the potential barriers to keep Him from pursuing and committing Himself to people in sincere friendship. The question is: ‘are we living in relationship – true friendship with God – or are we allowing barriers to get in the way?
Reflect today on the condition of your relationships. We can choose to bring the barriers out into the light of God’s perspective or we can choose to remain by ourselves. Sincere friendship is precious, rare and risky. Friendship requires: Agreement, loyalty, dependability, support, and sacrifice.
God follows through and is the most sincere friend a person could ever have. Will you be God’s friend? Will you be a friend to the friendless? We have the opportunity to receive a gift of relationship with God as well as the responsibility to share that with the world around us. God is and always be our best rainy day friend.
God does more than talk about sincere friendship. God is the sincere friend. God was willing to seek after and meet with Abraham and through Jesus’ work on the cross – God still seeks to be friends with us. Sunny days are beautiful, but real friendship is tested in the storms of life.


改編自 鮑慧兒: 改變生活習慣 休息再起步
(信報 2009年5月7日)
在這裏跟大家分享一些處理壓力的方法,讓各位能保持心情愉快。
根據研究,壓力的來源可以分成三種:生活風格,工作與性格。上星期談過什麼工作環境會對員工構成壓力,容易產生 burnout,那生活風格又會為我們帶來怎麼樣的壓力呢?你有遇上以下的情況嗎?
一、工時過長
如果你長期每星期工作超過八十小時,周末也工作,沒有休息時間,你就要小心了。你要問自己,花這麼多時間在工作上,真的有需要嗎?這麼長的工時是否就能令事情有成效?你可以怎樣 work smarter,而不光是 work harder 呢?
二、缺乏幫助或支援
如果你獨自撑起大量的工作與責任,不能授權其他人,經常想:「我不能離開一天,光是放一天假也不行。」的話,你的心理壓力會很大。但有這個想法的老闆比例很高呢!
最近我有一位客戶,她剛晉升為部門主管,公司生意也好得不得了,工作量也因此非常高,但她的下屬年紀都比較輕,她怕他們經驗不足做得不夠好,所以什麼事都親力親為。
加上她非常感激大老闆重用她,把她升為部門主管,老闆既對她有知遇之恩,她便更努力工作來報答老闆,就是累死也不讓自己停下來,最後不只把自己弄得消瘦不少,頭髮更是大把大把的掉。
不過,她都把這些藏在心內,沒跟人說,總是以為是自己能力不足,不懂推動員工。她這樣做並不健康,我知道她的性格,總是先為公司着想,把自己的需求擱在一旁,於是我很溫和地問她,她什麼時候才學會愛自己呢?如果她的孩子現在在她面前,會對她說什麼呢?
這樣一問,她才哇聲哭起來,願意跟我討論怎樣可學會「放下」與「下放」(授權)。
懂得授權、放權,知道什麼是重要的,要自己把關,什麼不直接管也不會出事,學會如何放權但懂得監控跟進,是處理這個問題的要訣。
三、缺乏社交支援
我們不單工作上需要別人支援,我們的情緒也需要別人來支援。有家人朋友可以傾訴討論,分享工作上遇到的種種問題和壓力,就是沒有實質的建議或幫忙,但只要有人肯傾聽,有人理解,也能抒解我們的情緒。如果他們能給予一點客觀或專業意見,那更是錦上添花了。最好還可以抽空一起玩樂,泡吧、購物、打球、「吹水」,做 spa,什麼都好。
根據正向心理學的研究,社交生活和有一些興趣,可以提升你的快樂指數,減低你的壓力呢!
四、沒有興趣或是沒有時間花在興趣上
這是很多工作狂的毛病,他們把所有時間都花在工作上,工作就是他們的興趣。有工作以外的興趣是好的,可以把你的精力與心神從工作中轉移,當你集中於你的興趣,從中得到樂趣,就是短短的一、兩個小時,也會是一個非常好的「提神」方法。
無論是聽音樂、寫書法、跳社交舞、做瑜伽、打拳、攝影,動的或是靜的,甚至做義工都好。其中運動是最有效的方法,因為運動還可以刺激分泌安多芬,讓人感覺快樂。
一位醫生朋友,施完十幾個小時的手術後還會去打網球,他說運動後要比之前精神多了,心情也舒暢多了!當然,做運動也可以保健,一舉三得,真的應該多做呀!
這也是愈來愈多人,尤其是年輕人的問題。根據研究,睡眠不足會減低你處理壓力的能力,很多人前一天晚上睡得不好,第二天便會較易跟其他人發生衝突。
許多研究都說,人類最適當的睡眠時間是晚上十一時到早上七時,每天要睡八小時。傳統智慧告訴我們要早睡早起,的確有道理!
六、缺乏休假
研究証明,不斷工作不是最有效的,平衡的生活包括適當的休假,當你的人與心離開工作環境,跟工作保持一段距離,你就可以看得清楚一點。更客觀地理解自身和工作情況,甚至可為事情找到新的解決方法。但要訣是,休假時要放空,盡量放鬆,不要去想有關工作的問題,而巧妙的是,當你不想它時,休假後回到工作崗位,你也會有新觀點,點子自然會浮現。
如果你去年聖誕節沒有休假,農曆年只放了幾天公眾假期,復活節也在工作的話,是時候放鬆自己,補充一下睡眠,把握機會與親友連繫,又或重新培養一種興趣,花一些時間在你的興趣上,為自己建立一個堅固的處理壓力平台,因為你需要準備「長期抗戰」呢!